If it doesn't fit, you must chuck that shit

Remember back in the days, caps had the plastic adjuster on the back. Then there was the fabric strip with the clasp. The purpose of those was to be able to adjust the hat to fit your head. But now we have fitted caps. No need for adjusting, just pick the size of your dome. So can somebody explain to me the logic behind buying a fitted cap that doesn't fit??? Honestly, whats the point? You've seen these retards walking around with caps so big that it looks like they're wearing a salad bowl. You can't see their face, all you see is their lips and chin, if that. And I know they can't see either. And who the hell started doing this shit where you just lay the cap on your head? If that ain't some stupid shit! It ain't even really on their heads, its just floating. And they always gotta keep adjusting it so that it floats just right. From what I've seen I think its supposed to float on the side instead of the top but for what? Sometimes I wonder if any of them has a protrusion they want to cover up, like the little girl on the Oblongs. And then some of them don't even wash the caps. I've seen the dirty ass caps with the brown ring on the inside. (The brown ring will show up on any color). The cap is always musty and moist and steamy. That's nasty. And I've seen some guys try to clean their caps and it just looks retarded. This one dude used a toothbrush to clean the brown ring and then just wiped off the soap. He only touched that inside strip and nothing else. The cap is still musty smelling so he febreezed it. When are people going to learn that febreezing something is not a substitute for a good washing? Caps need to be washed too. There is a way to wash a cap without losing its shape but I guess some people just don't think or don't care. And they wonder why their foreheads and necks are always itching. But that could be another problem lol

Waiting for Warfare

I can smell your wicked rigor mortis a mile from the morgue. The scorn in your soul may tell you to humiliate your enemies. Have not you read the Art of War? Absent minded to the enduring, pouring your cup of damnation in the midst of my world. You gotta be out your monkey ass mind. No more will the look of Medusa seduce the predecessors and entrepreneurs. --Bizzy Bone

Soon To Be Famous Quotes

Sayings from friends, associates, and such:

How can you be the shit without going thru the ass? - XPJ7

Control isn't telling someone what to do. It's removing all options to define their choices. - Anon

If you can't keep up, keep it moving - Butta

Even though you look better than her, doesn't mean that you're better than her. - Fatality

If you don't like the A, then you don't like me. - C Squad

Life's not a bitch, life is a beautiful woman! you only call her a bitch cuz she won't let you get that pussy! - Aesop rock - daylight

--more to come-- ---or add you own---

Personal Therapist

Some of my friends come to me to vent their frustrations. They just need someone to listen to them as they rant and rave about things going on in their lives. That's the kind of friend I am, I'm a listener. But the problem I have with a select few of them as when they ask me for advice and then don't take it only to come back to me complaining about the same problems (you know who you are). I assume you value my opinion, which is why you would ask me in the first place but honestly, I don't dish out gems of wisdom for my own listening enjoyment. I have no problem listening to you but I do have a problem when you ask for advice and don't take it. True, you don't have to take my advice but why ask for it if you aren't even gonna do it? If I got paid for every time I played personal therapist I could seriously consider quitting my job and doing this full time. One person in particular was having man troubles and I was friends with the guy as well. So when she calls me to complain about him, he calls me on the other line to complain about her. My phone bill was sky high for that month and I told both of them to give me money to pay my bill (yeah I'm still waiting on it but I don't let them forget it). Some of my friends like to play the "what if" game aka the "I have a friend who..." game as if I don't already know they are talking about themselves and the same situation that they been calling me about. Like I tell them all, don't ask me questions like that because if I were in that situation, it wouldn't have gotten to where it is because I would have already done X, Y, and Z. So by now, the situation would be totally different from where you are and where I would be, hypothetically. When I give advice, I think about what that person would do, not what I would do. I've known these people for years and I know their personalities so my advice is catered specifically to them. I could tell you what I would do but you aren't me and you won't do it. Hell, you already don't listen to the advice I give you. With some of them, they already know what the problem is and usually the solution is something simple but not something they want to do so they want more options. But if you know what you need to do, why don't you do it instead of wasting my time looking for another way out? I said I would listen but its a waste of my time to continuously listen to the same problems get worse even after you asked me for advice AND told me you know what the problem is. So its almost like what am I really there for? Anyways, I've started telling some of my friends (the ones that call regularly) that I'm charging a fee for my services. If your life is outta whack, and you want my help, its gonna cost you. Not much but I ain't doing it for free no more. That'll stop them from calling me lol

I Could Poison You

Why do people go into the refrigerator and eat someone else's food? Especially if you don't even know what it is? We are all adults here at my job (or at least I think most of us are). What ever happened to asking? If you're hungry and have no money to eat, ask someone for some change to raid the vending machine or ask if someone has enough food to share. Maybe I'm the only one here who had proper home training and learned not to touch things in the fridge that aren't yours. Now, I'd be well within my rights to put rat poison in some food and put it in the fridge. If someone gets sick from it, oh well. Shouldn't have been eating something that wasn't yours. THAT'LL TEACH YOU NOT TO TOUCH MY SHIT

(we'll see how the "experiment" goes)

Man vs. Animal

You know the world is getting crazy when people value the life of an animal over the life of a human being. History wasn't my best subject but I damn sure don't remember any animals doing anything to contribute to this country. So why is it that animal rights and privileges are being held to higher standards than those of a human being? And yes it is happening. Don't believe me? Take the situation going on with Michael Vick versus the situation with T.I. Somebody please explain to me how a two time felon caught on tape buying weapons can get a lesser penalty than a football star who fought dogs? Think about it. In Vick's case, there were some dogs that lost their lives but there were no human lives at stake. On the other hand, though he says he's protecting himself and his family, T.I. didn't buy guns to kill animals. They were meant to kill people. But who got in more trouble? People are still trying to end Vick's career but T.I. has yet to serve his few months and his career isn't even in jeopardy. Now, don't get me wrong. I love T.I. and I love Michael Vick. But the punishment for the circumstances isn't justifiable. You mean to tell me a felon serves less time than a non-felon? That's not justice. I hate that either one is in their respective situations but neither of them is stupid and they both knew what they were doing. My problem is that the so called justice system here isn't fair. Why would the lost of an animal's life be considered more sacred than our own species? Why are people holding animals to higher standards than humans? What has any animal done to contribute to human life and well being? Its bullshit. I'm not an animal hater but we are supposed to be at the top of the food chain. They are placing more value on the lives of animals. Before long, they'll be wanting to make animals citizens. Animals already have just about everything that humans have. They have clothes and houses, people are putting them as next of kin on their wills and leaving absurd amounts of money to them, they have spas and schools and hotels, they have their own charities and organizations who say you can sponsor an animal for 49 cents a day (about the same amount to sponsor a human???), they even have insurance! And people are quick to yell, "Animals are people too." NO THE HELL THEY ARE NOT!!! Animals are animals and people are people. Two different species. You can't swap organs or blood with animals. Animals have instinct. People have free will. Animals and people are not interchangeable. I wish these people will wake up and smell the dog shit.

THCream

Definition: when someone smokes so much weed that their cum makes another person high.

ATL Transplants

I am one of the few Atlanta born and raised Peaches still here. My city is changing. Its not even the same place anymore. Why? Because of the out of towners who moved here. You're welcomed to come, you're welcomed to stay. But why do ya'll wanna complain when you get here? Everybody wanna complain about how people drive here but do you not realize that most of the people in Atlanta arent from Atlanta? So YOU brought YOUR bad driving habits here just like everyone else but you wanna say its the people FROM Atlanta driving bad. WHAT THE FUCK EVER!!! Ya'll kill me complaining about the way things are here. Some say its too slow, too country, too ghetto, too gay, places close too early. Well, you know if you dont like it here you can take your ass back where the fuck you came from. Otherwise SHUT THE FUCK UP AND BE MERRY. Why come here and complain about the shit when you get here? We dont need you and your shit here. Hell, I KNOW I can definitely live without hearing another transplant muhfucka complaining about the place THEY CHOSE to come to. You can CHOSE to go somewhere else or you can CHOSE to stay and shut the fuck up. No matter what you decide to do, either way you still need to SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

Notoriously Awful

I spent my Valentine's Day at the movie theater watching Notorious. I have been personally boycotting the movie ever since I first heard about it. It was never something I wanted to see, especially not paying to see it. But my friend wanted to see it so I gave in and accompanied him. I already heard and read so much about the movie, not to mention we already know most of what happened. As much as I love movies, this was one on my To-Don't List. Its not that the movie was all that bad, I just feel like the man's death is constantly being exploited by Puffy. Think about it. Name another artist in hip-hop or R&B that died who has stuff going after their death (excluding post-mortem albums). Not Tupac. His movie actually had him in it so that doesn't count. It was about his philosophy on life moreso than his life itself. What about Aaliyah? Nothing. Left Eye had a documentary but she was in it, shooting some of it herself so it doesn't count either. Easy E? Nothing. Jam Master J? Nothing. J-Dilla? Nothing. But Puffy won't let you forget that he was Biggie's BFF or that Biggie died young or that he's supposed to be the best rapper ever. Puffy is always doing something to make people relive Biggie's death all over again. How can the man truly rest in peace if you're forever reminding us about it? The man's death was tragic and he died so young. Its a shame, yes. But can we please move on with our lives. Puffy is already a multimillionaire. Anything he puts his name on or attached to is gonna make money. So doing a movie about Biggie is a guaranteed million dollar money maker. Yeah he's gotta get the consent of the family and parties involved before he can start the project but I highly doubt that the idea for this movie originated with Biggie's family. Puffy came up with the idea and told the family. The family is gonna get paid and everyone wants money so why not go along with it. But my point is that Puffy is the one initiating everything and you know Puff is all about the benjamins. I was never a huge Biggie fan but I did like some of his music so I'm not hating on him. I just feel like this is another outlet for Puffy to make money. And then after the movie comes the clothing line. When will it stop? When we he still reminding up of that terrible tragedy? Wasn't Tupac's life just as important? Wasn't his death just as tragic? But do you hear all this fuss being kicked up about him? No. All I'm saying is just let the man rest in peace. His memory will live on without Puffy having to remind us about it every 3 months.

Chuck Norris Facts

Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe.

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.